Early Signs of Transformation

The process of real transformation requires letting the details, one by one fall into place.....even if that means a once in a lifetime shopping spree as one of them.....

 

 

"YELLOW BOOTS? Baby blue and wine colored ones TOO? PINK high heels? Where are you going to wear all this stuff? You NEVER buy NEW.....always that thrift store raggy items that is 5 years behind the fashions.  Did you know about Bisbee before all this?  You are in a mid-life crisis aren't you? What's next, a Red Miata?"

 

Molly was at it again with all the questions.  And I had no answers.  "Don't tempt me with the Red Miata...ah actually it was more pink than red......I saw one of Craigslist last week for $5000 I giggled.  And NO I first heard about Bisbee in February, I bought all this stuff in January and NO I am past mid-life now....I am considered an elder in this society...... it feels more like a delayed-post-menopause-phase, kinda like adolescence in a way too.  I am 60 but some days feel 40, even younger and other days 85.  I don't know how to be this old". 

 

It seems my body often knows something is up before it manifests in the physical.......and long before my brain get a hint.  That is the only way I can explain away the mindless and massive-but-cheap- bargain-hunters-delight-shopping-spree I went on during the "after holiday" sales.  It has continued up through March as well.....this urge to re-invent my image from the outside in.  My body was certainly getting ready for the move, an actual physical move out of Portland.  I felt possessed. 

 

"Not sure how I will like this mustard colored, SHORT sweater dress on you with your coloring but this purple tied-dye top thingy has possibilities.  It's Arizona too and it's hot, you can't wear this stuff there!".  Mollie was always well dressed, I mean even if she ran to the store she looked like a model so I tended to listen to her fashion sense.  I quickly responded trying to sound like I knew what I was talking about..... "I have 8 different kinds of colored leggings now. I think the brown or dark green ones will go fine with the mustard, even black will do, any color is fine..... AND the nights in Bisbee can get nippy as well as some winter temps.  It even snowed this last winter in Bisbee".  She looked at me sideways laughing so hard the tears ran down her face as I did my best to sound half-way fashion smart.  She ended up on the floor giggling from my futile fashion-speak attempts. 

Molly was getting it though... "This is the first time you have been free in decades huh?  Life was pretty hard for a very long time, heavy responsibilities, no fun for awhile there, all was very serious...but now...rebirth!".   

I then showed her the luscious coral, sparkly, ultra soft $7.63 sweater I bought at Macy's marked down from $49 and the sales slips for all the new shoes and dresses... $114.55...total. 

"Ah I like this new you and you did it on a budget" she commented rather enviously as she felt the smooth baby blue suede boots.   I had to agree I was a good, well excellent shopper......so good the local newspaper did an article on my bargain hunting abilities...... but it was more then just cashing in on the most amazing sales.... it was a completely and totally a spiritual thing. 

"Please take off my brown fringed boots Molly".